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Look At Me When I’m Talking To You.

June 1, 2005 by Mary & Kimberly

3625bk656

 

HEY!

I SAID, if it looked “so gay” when I tried it on in the store why didn’t you tell me that then?  Hmm? HMM?  Before I got it home and cut the frocking tags off?

And wipe that stupid smirk off your face. Like you ALWAYS make the best fashion choices, right?  Mr. Fuchsia Spandex Cycling Shorts. OH, I KNOW all about those!They’re on the top shelf in your closet! Don’t even ACT like I haven’t seen them!

I am SO not talking to you anymore. Like your silly striped tunic is ALL THAT.

God, you can be such a bitch sometimes.

Posted in 70's | 35 Comments

35 Responses

  1. on June 1, 2005 at 4:38 pm toiletpaper

    Not only are the FAST, but they are EASY too!! Break out the KY! But what I really want to know is what really is it they are modeling? Sleepwear? Gay-ware? If it’s sleepwear then why in the hell is “Mr.-Blue-Pants-I’m-A-Pouty_Bitch” wearing what appears to be platform shoes? And “Mr.-Dress-Wearing-She-Man” remind’s me of Elizabeth Taylor in Cleopatra.


  2. on June 1, 2005 at 5:08 pm leandra

    I like that the pattern is by “Butterick”. Hee!


  3. on June 1, 2005 at 7:44 pm Elaine

    Good Heavens! What is up with the saucy slit in the man caftan? (Man-tan? Caft-man?) It’s all too mind boggling for this gal.


  4. on June 1, 2005 at 8:14 pm Mik

    Ahh great Blog, now I’ll never look at my wife’s sewing patterns in the same light again. People didn’t actually wear that did they?
    Mik


  5. on June 1, 2005 at 11:36 pm Evelyn

    Ok. I love the site. Ya’ll are wicked funny!


  6. on June 2, 2005 at 3:07 am wimpy

    …and by the way, Stripey, no Real Man would be caught dead in a sleeve like that.


  7. on June 2, 2005 at 6:32 am Harmony

    rofl! Nice one :)


  8. on June 2, 2005 at 8:07 am Mik

    Wife told me she actually had that pattern and made the craptan thingy for herself. Methinks I’d better check she still doesn’t have it less she thinks I need such a bag of shite.

    Mik


  9. on June 2, 2005 at 9:25 am Colleen

    Has anyone seen a man (outside of a traditional or ethinic costume) wear something like that? WTF?


  10. on June 2, 2005 at 10:49 am Anna

    This site cracks me up!


  11. on June 2, 2005 at 10:56 am Jill

    I wonder what the person who made this pattern was on when they decided that a man needed a nightgown/dress like that? Yikes…


  12. on June 2, 2005 at 1:01 pm Shannon

    I feel the need to drive to my mother’s house and rummage through all of her old patterns.


  13. on June 2, 2005 at 1:21 pm Karen

    My (male) neighbor wears caftans like that out in his front yard all the time.


  14. on June 2, 2005 at 1:42 pm rose

    ouch. Diet Coke snorted out nose. Awesome blog.


  15. on June 2, 2005 at 2:05 pm David

    Oh, gawd! This one is so nutty that I want to believe the illustrator was in on the joke. The sad truth, though, is that they almost certainly weren’t.


  16. on June 2, 2005 at 2:33 pm Christine

    I have that pattern *eep!*

    I’ve never made it, nor do I plan to, but after seeing your take on it, I’ll have to pull it out and giggle, along with the other patterns I’ve picked up at yard sales.


  17. on June 3, 2005 at 9:33 am Pam

    Yep, Mik. I’ve actually seen someone in the flesh wear this gay-tan. It was in the mid 70s. This guy was helping (he was in art history and schulpting) my sister move and stayed overnight at our parents’ house. I’ll never forget the look on my mom’s face (nor mine) when he came downstairs after his bath. Too funny.


  18. on June 3, 2005 at 3:57 pm guest

    Paul Lynde used to wear caftans. Caftan-man shaves his legs.


  19. on June 3, 2005 at 9:05 pm Bonnie

    OMG, I made this pattern for my husband way-back-when. I do believe it was in 1977 – I was pregnant and wanted him to experience the stylish thrill of maternity clothes, too. It must have had something to do with my hormones. What a man – he nearly wore it out!


  20. on June 4, 2005 at 12:14 am Jeff

    “Well, you know what they say ‘A girl can run faster with her dress up than a man can with his pants down.’ Bitch, I’m here to tell you, you better be looking for an escape route pronto because I’ve got a razor-sharp knife hidden here in my drag and you’re about to get stuck! I’m going to gore you a new butthole, the likes of which you’ve never seen before….you with that nasty, hairy hinterland of yours!”


  21. on June 4, 2005 at 7:12 pm Dan

    Actually, I imagine that’s what Ozymandias (from The Watchmen) wears to bed. Except what’s with that weird bulge in his stomche area? Malnutrition? Bad posture? Early stages of pregnancy?


  22. on June 4, 2005 at 7:16 pm aline

    Oh, what a nice chemise for SCA garb…. only why’s it on a man??


  23. on June 4, 2005 at 7:40 pm elljay

    Isn’t ’striped-shirt guy’ Gregg from the Brady Bunch?


  24. on June 6, 2005 at 12:51 pm guest

    He looks more like Mike Brady to me.


  25. on June 17, 2005 at 1:19 pm blah

    omg. i was scrolling down and i was actually recognizing styles from the 70s from movies and pictures and my dads memories and all….until this one. omg. i had to rub my eyes. lord save us all.

    haha, and then i read the comments…..my cheeks hurt….


  26. on June 17, 2005 at 10:11 pm Jade

    Lawrence of Gay-rabia meets “Salty Jacques” the naughty French pirate. Oo-la-la!


  27. on June 19, 2005 at 5:59 pm marcus

    Ya know, I just happen to be odd enough to be a straight man who DOES happen to own AND wear this caftan!! Probably a left over from wearing period 18th and 19th cent. clothes, but I still wear it and will continue to do so… curiously only a few of my sleeping companions have ever seen me in it though….


  28. on June 20, 2005 at 11:09 pm Vickie

    Guess what..I think my mother had, or worse STILL HAS that pattern. She made one for my dad, and for the past 30 years has worn an incarnation of one ALMOST EVERY NIGHT. NO JOKE! When we were kids, we never let anyone come over if we thought he was still awake…too many “why is your dad wearing a dress?” comments. Scary thing is–is a welder who restores vintage Harleys. I think I call him and ask which one he is wearing now. HA HA HA.


  29. on June 21, 2005 at 7:02 pm Mona

    I just got forwarded to this site, and of course the first thing I see is that hilarious pattern. I guess people, men especially, weren’t so uptight and defensive about their homosexuality. On a quick serious note (gasp!), obviously people’s views on what’s “gay” changes with time, and maybe they should examine their prejudices.


  30. on June 26, 2005 at 5:01 am Pamela

    “Bruce, i wanted to wear that to the chartreuse’ moose tonight, I’m sick of you raiding my closet!”


  31. on June 26, 2005 at 9:52 pm jfasoga

    “Like, if you knew about the spandex shorts, then, like, why aren’t you wearing them? I think they’re, like the bomb!”


  32. on June 30, 2005 at 5:48 pm millenniumhippies

    omg i am laughing out loud! your site is fantastic! just found you yesterday and blogrolled you!


  33. on March 26, 2006 at 3:31 pm suzy

    Wow. I found this pattern yesterday in value village and nearly had a heart attack. I bought it to make costumes for my school play.


  34. on September 5, 2006 at 2:46 pm lorie

    I actually made this for a boyfriend in 1977.
    We shared a house with another couple and he was always walking around nekkid.
    One day he borrowed my robe- I sewed this the next day…
    He looked lovely with his long black hair!


  35. on October 17, 2006 at 10:27 am marnia

    OMG!!!! this is oh-so-funny!!



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