Once fall rolls around there’s that nice nip in the air. You find yourself slipping a sweater over that t-shirt….later; you’re not letting the kids out of the house without a jacket. You’ve started letting the cats sleep in the garage at night, no matter how much your husband complains. By November the thermostat is cranked up at all times, power bills be damned, you’ve got to do what you can to stay warm. Certainly we can all use a little extra comfort this time of year.
Which brings us to an important question:
Have you thought about your hard-boiled eggs?
I really want to meet the person who greenlighted this ad layout.
Why the ruffle-y skirt things?
I’ve heard of tea cozies, but this is ridiculous….
Won’t the egg have cooled by the time you finish knitting the cozy? What? You knit them ahead of time, store them, and actually know where they’re kept?
hahahaha those rnt 4 those kinda eggs, she made m 4 her hushand thay r just drying out after they fell in the toilet….
oh look, it’s a family portrait….we have mom egg cozy to the right and Dad egg cozy to left. In the middle are their three youngins, Rosie, Josie and Edwina…(Edwina never really fit in with the Cozys…heard tell she was adopted from a family of angora mittens)
Is there a matching sweater for the chicken?
I can just see that queen alien from the second ‘Alien’ movie knitting these egg-cozy things with that extra set of mini-arms she had (I always wondered what they were for). Occasionally she’ll glance back at her bloated abdomen seething full of those pods that the facehuggers jump out of and sigh.
“Who luvz you? Mummy luvvvs youzies! That’s who!”
I’m not a big fan of dressing up something right before I eat it.
Although, wouldn’t an egg cozy that is crocheted to look like an egg be cool?
They look like Christmas ornaments gone bad.
You know, it’s been a while since I thought about my hard-boiled eggs.
What? What’s that you say? The siren-like call for me to feverishly crochet cozies for my hardboiled eggs is coming FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE??!!
What? There are only 5 variations? Surely they would have enough creativity for a full dozen. Leave no egg uncozy.
RST
Gee and I thought someone had patterns for crocheting condoms.
crochet condoms. I like it. A new kind of birth control altogether. The way it works, when the time comes and you unfurl the crochet-condom, either a) both partners crack up laughing and mood is spoiled or b)convinced that good potential mates don’t wear crochet, one is warned off.
Or c) the fear of rug burn far outweighs the relief of engaging in safer sex with a cozied willy.
Why? WHY would anyone do this?
WHY!?
mmmoooommmm… I can’t find breakfast. I see the oj, but…ahhh. Brillant mom, brillant. You know you don’t have to actually use everything Aunt Martha gives you – there’s a whole back of the closet to hide things, just add it to the toliet paper barbie doll cozy collection.
Or D) the fear of spewing fibers for a week makes you stop dead in your tracks. Can anyone say “Toxic Shock Crochet Condom”??
It kind of brings a whole new meaning to the phrase “warm fuzzies” doesn’t it?
OMG. My grandmother gave me a huge box of what I thoughted were Christmas bells ornaments, but I see now that they are egg cozys! It’s genius! I think I’ll have her make me some waffle cozys, and a cozy of my Cap’n Crunch box, and one for the spoon, and one for the handbasket I’m in…….
…they could also double as pasties. Nothin’ wrong with multi-purpose crochet. Keep those nips warm when it’s a tidly bit nipply outside…
This looks like something Amelia Bedelia would come up with.
Did anyone notice the clever copy, “Egging you on in crochet.” ??? They just don’t write ‘em like that any more. Sigh.
These egg cozies never caught on–why is that?
Do you think it’s the study that demonstrated that a man’s sperm count diminishes when his testicles are kept too warm?
All those mothers who insisted their sons put on their egg cozies before they went out to play–and then, years later, wondered why they didn’t have any grandchildren … it all becomes clear, doesn’t it?
Does anyone have a pattern for an oatmeal cozy? I just hate it when my oatmeal gets cold and lumpy.
This is what people did before there was internet porn.
These are your eggs.
These are your eggs in silly hats.
Any questions?
-bb
Even better, these have actually been featured as an important prop in a murder mystery (OK, a tongue-in-cheek parody of a murder mystery): The Affair of the Blood-Stained Egg Cosy. Really. It’s on Amazon. I guarantee you’ll love it.
No kidding. When my mother when to England last year – I made her bring home egg cozies for me. Despite all the derision, they are actually very useful to keep a SOFT boiled egg nice and warm awaiting the recipient. Coordinating arrival at the breakfast table at the exact moment your egg is retrieved from hot water is not easy. Ever try to dip “toast fingers” in cold egg yoke? Pattern anyone? Cheers, CJB
I would like the pattern too. All of the SOFT boiled egg cosies I’ve seen were brought over by people from Europe–I haven’t them in the US.